Are you in a rebound relationship?

We’ve all heard of rebound relationships. That first person you get feelings for after ending a long term relationship can make you feel that perhaps there is life after love, but are they really a good idea?

The thing with rebound relationships is that there will never be just two people in it. The ex or even exes will likely be in it too and it can, in turn, get a little bit crowded.

It may feel like the real thing when it’s complete with tummy flutters and birds tweeting, but there are a few signs you can look out for that will help you determine whether it’s potentially the real deal or whether you really are taking a ride on the rebound train.

The relationship begins soon after a breakup

Has the relationship started soon after a breakup? If so, you will have had no breathing space or a pause to reevaluate your new life. Lots of rebounders feel that any hurt they are feeling will disappear if they find a new partner to share their time with.

The truth is, you need time after a relationship to give yourself the space you need to get over the hurt of the past. New beginnings can’t come along if you haven’t wiped the slate clean yourself.

Are you dating to make your ex jealous?

Do you really want to go out on that date and spend time with that guy or are you doing it just so that the news gets back to your ex to make them jealous?

If nothing else, this kind of behaviour might feed your own ego in the hope that seeing you with someone new will make your ex feel regretful that they let you go. If you’re seeing someone, for this reason, it goes without saying that the feelings you have for the new person, aren’t the reason to get into a new relationship with them any time soon.

Talking about the ex

Are you talking about your ex all the time? You may not even know you’re doing it, but by consciously or unconsciously talking about them, either by ranting or expressing hurt, could indicate that you’re not over them yet and probably aren’t ready to move on with someone new.

Not talking about the ex

Believe it or not, not talking about the ex could be a sign too. By not opening up about a past relationship or any hurt endured, it could indicate that there is a lack of closure. You might feel bad that the relationship failed and might avoid the subject altogether.

There is no doubt that the end of a relationship can be hard. Instead of focussing all of your time on someone new, make time for yourself. Give yourself time to grieve and avoid the complications and confusing equations of a rebound relationship. In time you will be more than ready to move on and be able to go into a new relationship for all of the right reasons.