Introverted Me

It’s only in the last few years that I’ve come to learn more about people being either introverted or extroverted. I realised of course, over the course of my childhood and young adulthood that I had my own little ways and preferences but I didn’t realise that these things were down to my personality type. This has only been more recent that I’ve come to understand that I am by no means alone in some of the things I do, or how certain situations make me feel.

So, with a view to help introverts be better understood and maybe, possibly, make those nearest to me, understand me a little more, I decided to share with you, the introverted me.

I like to spend time alone

Some people can take offence if I don’t always want them around. Assuming that it’s because I don’t like their company. This is not the case, at all. I promise you. I just need time to myself. I can be around people, of course I can but I also need that time by myself just to recharge. If I don’t get this, I can feel myself start to feel uneasy. It’s best for everyone that I get this all important time for me. I’m not being anti-social or rude. I’m just being good to myself.

I hate last minute plans

I can’t tell you how much this makes me feel on edge. If I am supposed to be going somewhere or doing something, I need to know when and at what time and what any other plans are. I hate not knowing with a passion. I can’t explain why, it’s just something that my brain needs to know. If I don’t, it makes me feel really anxious.

This can be quite hard when it comes to my husband. He is totally the opposite and so are his family for that matter. I think he thinks I get uptight about it because he’s just so used to not knowing when things are going on until the last minute, but I just can’t operate like that. I need to know. For me.

Text me, don’t call me

This isn’t because I don’t want to hear from you or talk to you. Far from it. But if I don’t answer a call from you, shock horror, it might not be because I haven’t got to my phone in time. It could just be that I don’t want to talk at that moment in time. There are two people I can talk to easily on the phone. My Mum and my Husband. That’s it. Anyone else and I get anxiety. It sounds stupid I know but I am not feeling bad about this anymore, because this is perfectly normal for an introvert. In fact, it’s one of the most common traits.

introverted me

Text me and you will likely hear back from me straight away or at least very soon. Call me and you may just end up annoyed that I don’t pick up and think I’m being rude. Unless of course the conversation is an emergency then that is different entirely. Failing that, text me first. Tell me you need to chat, then I can call you when I’m cool with that.

Don’t turn up unexpected

I’ve always been a big believer in that you shouldn’t just turn up at someones house unexpected. Now I don’t know whether this is entirely connected to my introversion but I can’t stand it when people do this to me. It goes hand in hand with the ‘making plans’ point I made earlier. Even when I’m at home, I will likely know what I’m doing and when I’m going to do it and if someone just turns up unexpected – this means I have to change all of that. Let me know first. Text me. As long as I know in advance and it’s convenient, of course you will be welcome.

I need 10 minutes to myself in the morning

This didn’t become apparent until I had my own family. For years and years this was a given. Getting ready for work before I had the Little Man was always a bit of time to myself. But since I have been a Mum, time to myself doesn’t come so easy. So, in recent years I have found myself craving just ten minutes to myself before I get up and start my day. If I don’t get this, I feel on edge. I can’t describe this any other way. Even if for those ten minutes I’m scrolling through Twitter, or just lying there thinking about the day or week ahead. I need it.

Don’t be offended if I turn down your invite

I have lost count of the amount of times that I have made plans and have looked forward to them only to get to the day before the event and find myself not wanting to go. The thought of getting dressed up and going out is nowhere near as appealing as snuggling under a blanket and watching the television or a film. So if I ever say no to an offer or an invite, don’t take it personally. It’s not you, it’s me! It’s a cliche, but it’s the truth. Sometimes we just want and need to be at home.

introverted me

I have a sixth sense

You can’t hide much from me. I have this weird sixth sense that helps me pick up any negative vibes or energy. If someone’s mood is low, you can count on me to pick up on it straight away. It can be annoying at times, especially if the person concerned doesn’t want to talk about it, but at the same time it can be useful.

I’m not a snob

I was called this a lot as a child. I am by no means a snob. Just because I keep myself to myself and I don’t mix with people I don’t know. Just because I’m quiet and reserved. Just because I’m not the life and the soul of the party. I’m not a snob. I’m just me. I have accepted that so I would appreciate it if you did too.

…and finally…

Don’t try to change me

If you are an extrovert and don’t understand why I’m not more like you, please don’t try to change me. Don’t tell me that I should pick the phone up and make the call. Don’t tell me that I should go out and enjoy myself. Don’t tell me that I should mix with more people and make new friends.

When you tell me to do these things you are asking me to be someone that I’m not. I am me. I’m happy with who I am and you should be too. Please, just understand that I am not like you and that I am happy doing things and living my life the way I feel comfortable. I will do things the way I like to do them and in the way that I enjoy doing so. Please just accept that we are all different and what works for you might not work for me. You are more likely to gain my trust this way and I am more likely to ‘come out of my shell’ with you in the long run.

 

So, that is the introverted me. No holds barred. Right there in black and white. This is who I am and I’m happy being this way. It doesn’t make me weak or a lesser person. It makes me, me and I can live with that.

 

If you want to read more about introverts and their traits, check out this article on elephantjournal.com. I could totally relate to it and it explains us brilliantly.

 

Are you an introvert? Do you know one? Can you relate to what you have read? Let me know in the comments, I’d love to hear from you.

 

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29 Comment

  1. Reply
    Ross Hunt
    15th January 2018 at 9:55 am

    Sounds a lot like me! Excellent post!

  2. Reply
    S A Edwards
    15th January 2018 at 10:54 am

    Wow, I can relate to so much of this. I’m definitely an introvert. That’s partly why I love working from home. I love not having to deal with people. Face-to-face, at least.

  3. Reply
    Jade @ Captured By Jade
    15th January 2018 at 6:39 pm

    Oh, Jaki – I feel like I could have written this post myself! And that precious time to myself of a morning; day saver!

  4. Reply
    Monsterful Mama
    16th January 2018 at 6:12 am

    I can completely relate to this. I have been up since 5 for some ‘me time’. I’ve always been quite independent and like my own space which is a tad difficult when you’re a wife and mother. The only thing thats not 100% introverted is that I do like to do is sit alone in a coffee shop with my work/thoughts. I find the noise, the hustle and bustle of a busy coffee shop quite relaxing. Plus I do enjoy people watching, making stories up in my head about the people I see. HAHA.

    Thanks for sharing!
    #triumphanttales

  5. Reply
    Helen aka Welsh Mum Writing
    16th January 2018 at 9:10 am

    Sounds like me. I’m an INFJ personality type but present as an extrovert which causes others no end of problems. Understanding your introversion really helps. I need to do better this year in terms of self care and finding ways for me to have alone time – not easy with a two year old but he will thank me for it in the long term. #triumphantales

  6. Reply
    ettieandme
    16th January 2018 at 10:31 am

    Oh my goodness some of these could have come straight out of my mind!! My husband always tells me off for being too paranoid but I swear I have a sixth sense too and I dont even need to have seen the person recently to know!! Sometimes alone time is the best time! Thanks for sharing this 🙂 #familyfun

  7. Reply
    Sim @ Simslife.co.uk
    16th January 2018 at 10:48 am

    I totally get you with the needing time alone, I just need time to myself and to click off from dealing with people. I also hate people changing plans, sends me all off at a kilter, so even though I am mainly extrovert, it’s nice to realise I have introvert tendencies too. A fab read 🙂 Sim x #triumphanttales

  8. Reply
    cheshiresentutor
    16th January 2018 at 12:15 pm

    Really interesting read, and a v well written post

  9. Reply
    franbackwithabump
    16th January 2018 at 2:10 pm

    A great post and can definitely relate. Most of the time my phone is on silent and I am definitely more of a texter! #triumphanttales x

  10. Reply
    Jean | DelightfulRepast.com
    16th January 2018 at 3:03 pm

    Jaki, sounds like you might be an INFJ. Have you done the MBTI test? Myers-Briggs Type Indicator. If not, look into it!

  11. Reply
    mummyhereandthere
    16th January 2018 at 6:47 pm

    I identify with this, I am such an introvert. I like to be in control and I enjoy time by myself that if I don’t get ir I get ratty X #anythinggoes

  12. Reply
    oldhouseintheshires
    16th January 2018 at 6:50 pm

    Excellent post. I feel like I’m very much in between, there are days when I feel like an introvert and other days I’m more outgoing and an extrovert. I think we are all on a spectrum and I must be in the middle. Great post though. I think some people feel like they have to be extroverted all the time but that’s not true. #triumphanttales

  13. Reply
    Liz
    17th January 2018 at 9:12 am

    Introverts are often highly sensitive people (HSP’s). It is worth checking out the work of Elaine Aron and Judith Orloff. Once we understand how it all works it is something to celebrate.

  14. Reply
    The Queen of Collage
    17th January 2018 at 7:01 pm

    Walking into a room full of people unnerves me and I like my own company so yes I’m an introvert too. I also used to shy away from the phone. #FamilyFunLinky

  15. Reply
    One Hull of a Dad
    18th January 2018 at 10:19 am

    I can relate to almost every point here too! I don’t get anxious on speaking to people on the phone, i’d just prefer not too lol, with a text i can reply when every i see fit but with a phone call you cant just put the phone down when you’re bored. I have never thought of myself as an introvert but after reading this i guess i am! #TriumphantTales

  16. Reply
    Morgan Prince
    18th January 2018 at 2:08 pm

    Oh I hear you! This is SO me too. I hate last minute plans, can’t stand a room full of people and need that time to myself. I am totally an introvert!
    #coolmumclub

  17. Reply
    endardoo
    19th January 2018 at 9:37 am

    I believe there is a lot more people like you than people think. I think it’s great to own who you are and try and live the way you want to. I love your manifesto!

  18. Reply
    nightwisprav3n
    19th January 2018 at 1:49 pm

    I also discovered this about myself a few years ago. I’m an extroverted introvert. I have my times when I’m very social and can be the life of the party but most of the time I’d rather be alone. A lot of the things on your list fit me to a T. #FamilyFunLinky

  19. Reply
    Alana - Burnished Chaos
    19th January 2018 at 2:40 pm

    You’ve just totally described me, down to the last detail. If I don’t get time to myself on a morning the whole day feels filled with anxiety and hate talking on the phone with a passion!
    Thank you for joining #FamilyFunLinky x

  20. Reply
    Mrs Jibril
    19th January 2018 at 5:02 pm

    after reading this I think I’m also a little introvert even though I blog regularly and even post videos online #TriumphantTales

  21. Reply
    Jo - Pickle & Poppet
    19th January 2018 at 10:25 pm

    I can completely relate to this. When I was in my partying days I would have said that I was an extrovert but now I think I was just great at putting on a show. I’m much more comfortable in my own skin now. I can relate to so much of this post but it is the going out that I really struggle with. I love to make plans to meet friends but when it comes to it I just feel so nervous now and snuggling under a blanket with a film feels much more appealing! #TriumphantTales

  22. Reply
    Zoe
    20th January 2018 at 1:32 pm

    I’m very much the same and happy that way. That wasn’t always the case though, I’ve had to learn to understand and love my quirks! Thanks so much for sharing with #Blogstravaganza xx

  23. Reply
    diynige
    20th January 2018 at 6:41 pm

    Omg! I think this is me, I have often been called anti-social I m not I just like my own company fab read Thank you for linking to #Thatfridaylinky please come back next week

  24. Reply
    Tammymum
    20th January 2018 at 6:59 pm

    I am the same i prefer texts than calls and I love them to myself. I never get it these days but I really treasure it when I do. I don’t mean anything unit it’s just who I am. #triumphantales

  25. Reply
    aliduke79hotmailcom
    20th January 2018 at 7:35 pm

    I love this post. I also need time to myself, I always have. My husband knows now when I am needing time for me and just leaves me to it. He found it hard at first, but he has gotten used to me lol.
    #TriumphantTales

  26. Reply
    anywaytostayathome
    21st January 2018 at 10:33 pm

    So glad I’m not the only one who would much rather text than call. I’m also not a fan of an unexpected visitor, unless it’s my bestie kim, she can rock up whenever and it would bother me, but she doesn’t judge, not even a teensy bit. #blogstravaganza

  27. Reply
    crummymummy1
    22nd January 2018 at 8:13 pm

    I can relate to many of these but wouldn’t say I was an introvert or extrovert – I think I’m somewhere in the middle! #twinklytuesday

  28. Reply
    So Happy In Town (@SoHappyInTown)
    25th January 2018 at 1:06 pm

    I’m so with you on talking on the phone – I’d so much rather send a text or an e-mail and I can only happily speak to my mum, husband, my brothers and a couple of my best friends on the phone, though I’d always rather text even my best friends. #coolmumclub

  29. Reply
    Lisa Pomerantz
    26th January 2018 at 11:19 am

    Great honest post, and so true of teh many introverts I know and love! Just be! #triumphanttales xoxo

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