What to do if you don’t feel like playing with your child?

Children grow, develop and acquire new skills, interacting in the form of a game, first with an adult, then with other children and with objects of the surrounding world. Until a certain age, the game is the leading activity for the child, and the mother or other significant adult is his main playmate. But what if you are not particularly interested in playing with the child? Is this really a serious problem? Here we have listed the answers to this question.

Why the game is very important

Every mother wants to give the maximum possible and useful to her child. The world of the preschooler is the world of the game, it is important and necessary for him. In the process of the game, thinking, attention, memory, imagination, speech, communication skills, the ability to express oneself and create develop.

The child needs to be taught to play, showing him how to do it. If we play with the baby through force, because “it is supposed to”, we will not be able to get involved in the game emotionally, captivate with our interest, and show the value of joint activities. But we can give your child attention! Practice shows that even 20 minutes a day allocated by parents to play with the child positively affects the parent-child relationship, favourably affect the baby’s behaviour, its development and upbringing.

Playing with the child, we give him a sense of acceptance, we are included in his experiences, which is very important for children of early age and older, we share with him our ways of overcoming difficulties and solving problems. This gives rise to self-confidence in the emerging personality, the ability to regulate their emotions, cope with experiences. An adult help to diversify a child’s play, thereby developing his imagination and self-expression. Thanks to this, the ability of a growing person to adapt to different life situations increases.

And if we refuse to play with the child, we deprive him of the opportunity to develop all of the above. We complicate its adaptation to society, do not contribute to its emotional and intellectual development. In the future, it is more difficult for us to build trusting relationships with the child, to find mutual understanding and ways to support a small person. You can admit your child to a prep campus to fill up some of the gaps, however, its is still imperative that you must spend some quality playtime with your chi

What exactly games teach a child?

Even the simplest game makes a huge contribution to the comprehensive development of the psyche of the baby. So, playing with dolls, “mother-daughter”, the child comprehends the relationship, learns to interact, takes out experiences from the inner world outside to find new patterns of behaviour.

Playing war or superheroes, rescuers, the kid learns to express his aggression in acceptable ways, to defend his place in the world, to maintain his own borders, to manifest himself in a new way, try his hand, affirm his thirst for life and his ability to survive in a frightening world.
Constructor or cubes, best sand tables with a lid and city building not only develop thinking, imagination and spatial perception but also help to structure the accumulated experience, express a desire to assemble yourself, build, learn to cope with failures.
The game of the store, the seller and the buyer combine with their own values, internal and external: what can I give, what I want to receive; what I can do, what I have, and what another.

Games with rules contribute to the development of self-control and self-regulation of the behaviour of the child.

Why did you become uninterested in playing?

Have you lost interest in playing with your child, or did you basically not have one? There may be several reasons.

You are too adult

On the one hand, this is the parent’s inability to play, an orientation toward business, intellectual communication with the child. On the other hand, there is an excessive preoccupation with everyday issues, when actions like feeding, dressing, washing, come to the fore and are perceived as the main manifestations of love and care.

You do not accept the child in yourself

Another reason for mom’s unwillingness to play with the baby may be an unpleasant experience of her own childhood. In the game we need to go down to the level of the child, connect with our children’s part, this can give rise to a feeling of weakness, powerlessness or shame in us that we don’t want to face at all.

Are you afraid of losing control of the situation?

Playing with a child, we meet his emotions, feelings – and sometimes we don’t know what to do with it. This may be children’s aggression, and fears, and excessive exactingness. With children who show negative emotions, parents can also develop resistance to the game and emotional contact.

But most often, the reluctance to play with the child is due to a lack of understanding of the psychological meaning of the game, its significance for the development and health of the baby.

It is important to understand why playing with your own child creates tension, what feelings affect. And if the level of anxiety is still too high, if the game is a burden, you can find other ways to communicate with the baby and delegate the game to other close significant adults, such as dad or grandmother.

How to revive interest in the game?

If, nevertheless, you do not want to attract other relatives, if you are ready to play with the child yourself, try to look at the situation differently: perhaps this will help to revive interest.

It becomes interesting to play when you realize that it carries a deeper meaning than simple entertainment, and develops different facets of the child’s personality.
There are many options for games, you can try to find what is interesting to you. Remember what you liked to play in your childhood, try playing these games with your child.
Do not be afraid to look ridiculous in the game with the child, to be on the same level as him, but remain emotional support for him.
It is in the game that the uniqueness of the child is manifested. And this is a chance to better know your own baby, his interests and character traits.
The game is a creative process, you can try to make it into the game or beat what attracts and motivates you. For example, choose a character who is constantly engaged in sports, if you are a fitness enthusiast or build your sports club out of cubes, or you can play the buyer of a sports store.

The game is, first and foremost, freedom of expression, the joy and pleasure of interacting with each other, and not an obligation and a mandate for adults. Joint activities with a child are incredibly valuable! And to build and fill it will help the living creative principle, which is in every parent.