When we get married, stand at the altar and say ‘I do’ most people don’t picture the worst. There are very few individuals who stand there and think, two years from now, I might be divorced. That isn’t the way life works. We dream of the best, and when the worst comes, we don’t know how to handle it. We might not even recognize that the relationship has reached a breaking point. There are lots of couples around the world right now who are staying together when they should really be thinking about a separation. Now, before you get carried away, I’m not suggesting that all marriages are doomed. But you do need to recognize the signs of trouble and know when it might be time to walk away or attempt a repair.
No Trust Equals No Love
If you can’t trust your partner, how can you stay with them? If there is even the slightest doubt about whether they are honest with you, that points to a serious problem in the relationship. You shouldn’t just ignore it. There was a post on social media suggesting that eight percent of relationships would end if the partners switched to cell phones for one day. I know the implication here, we’re all cheating scoundrels, or we all have secrets. But the fact is if you’re already itching to get your hands on your partner’s phone there’s an issue. And, if they constantly keep it from you, there’s another problem. The trouble is you can’t build trust by proving there’s a reason for it being there in the first place.
Violence And Control
It’s not possible to rebuild a relationship if violence has taken place from either side. If your partner has hit you or you have hit your partner, it’s time to think about getting a divorce. Many people in the situation don’t take action because they are scared, think the concerns can be resolved or find the concept of a divorce complicated. But you have to remember that you will have a lawyer to help you through each step in your divorce. You won’t be alone, and it’s not just violence that you need to think about here.
Control can be another issue that could lead to the end of the marriage. Do you constantly feel as though your partner is deciding what you do and how you do it? If that’s the case, you need to think about what this means and perhaps seek counselling. It is possible that your partner doesn’t realise they are taking this role in the relationship. If that’s the case talking to someone will help a great deal.
Or lastly, you need to think about what happens if your partner is unfaithful or shows signs of being unfaithful. At this point, you need to think about whether you can forgive and rebuild the trust. It will take time for this to happen and both people in the relationship must be committed to the idea. Again, it is worth getting outside help when a serious breach of trust has occurred.
This is a collaborative post