Guest Blogger Series: You Won’t Make Me Feel Bad – Tammymum

Guest Blogger Series: You Won’t Make Me Feel Bad – Tammymum

The next instalment in my Guest Blogger Series comes from fellow Midlands Mummy Blogger Sarah who blogs over at Tammymum. We’re going to jump straight in this week and let Sarah introduce herself.

Hello, I’m Sarah. Mum of two tiny tinkers with just 11 months between them. Lawyer turned writer. The owner of Tammymum – an honest but heartfelt family & lifestyle blog with a penchant for travel and a passion for style – both in your home and your wardrobe. I am your typical mum cliche drinking coffee and wine, wearing sunglasses and always taking photos…

Guest Blogger Series: You Won't Make Me Feel Bad - Tammymum

You Won’t Make Me Feel Bad

Readers of my blog will know we are no strangers to a holiday. We are entering the 6 month of the year and have embarked on 4 already. Our one and two year old have been on more flights in their little lives than some people have ever. I am not bragging, it is just how it is. Our children are not at school yet and my partner’s work gives him flexibility so we are fortunate enough to be able to jet off at a moments notice. So we do. Yet of late our lifestyle choices have been brought into question. The number of holidays we take, the fact I write about them, we publish them on social media, the fact I dared to complain about some of said holidays I am privileged enough to take.

That said, I have said it before and I will say it again, one holiday in Menorca was so damn awful I shudder to think about it. There. I said it again.

Guest Blogger Series: You Won't Make Me Feel Bad - Tammymum

Yet I am not supposed to complain right? I was lucky enough to be on holiday. I wasn’t in the office, I wasn’t battling the infamous British Summer, or lack thereof, solo whilst my partner was at work. What an ungrateful cow huh?

The thing is though, I will not apologise and I will not feel bad. Yes, we are fortunate to be able to go on holiday, but the term holiday is much of a misnomer. Because really the one and two-year-old combo are hard work, in this country or a sunnier one. They do not appreciate what a holiday is. They are not interested in chilling on a sun lounger, having a leisurely meal or exploring the local surroundings. The things we, or I,  associate with holidays. The days are still very much dictated by the small ones, we still get up at the time they choose, we still spend the days making them happy, choosing activities for them, working around their nap times, and so on.

Raising children is hard, raising two small children is very hard. It requires an incomparable level of selflessness. I know I am supposed to treasure every moment, but like many of the so say ‘slummy mummy’s’ out there I appreciate that not every moment is special. Some are infuriating and some mind-numbingly boring.

Some, however, are priceless. Some moments in this country or abroad are just so bloody special it makes all the bad moments pale into insignificance.

Now I know we don’t need to be on holiday to have these special moments. The difference, however, or what is most special about these holidays and these moments is that we are there as a family. I am not parenting alone whilst Mr Tammy works all the hours.

When we are not on holiday he is not good at taking time off. He works for himself and time off means no pay. He doesn’t have a weekend, we don’t have a weekend, some weeks he doesn’t even have a day off. So those ‘holidays’, those weeks in the sun, ‘living the life’, that I write about, moan about, and post on social media, they are well earned. They are deserved and for us, they are when we get to be together as a family. My children get to spend time with their father, I get to spend time with my partner, real time not just the few hours before we crash out each night. I know it might not make sense to a lot of people but it works for us and I will not be made to feel bad about it.

What is more, we are in new surroundings, my children are in new places, broadening their horizons. They will not be brought up afraid of flying, they will approach new places, new experiences, new cultures and new foods with open arms. It is my hope that this level of travel from an early age will help to raise them to be open minded in every sense of the word. I am not saying this is the only way to raise your children with an open mind but again, it works for us.

So I won’t apologise for putting photos of our beachside cocktails on social media. I won’t apologise for writing about our getaways and I won’t be made to feel bad for moaning when they aren’t always perfect. This is how we choose to spend our family time, whilst we can and shame on anyone who judges me for doing so. Live and let live.

 

You can find Sarah in the following places online:

http://tammymum.com

https://www.facebook.com/tammymumuk/

https://www.instagram.com/tammymumuk/

https://www.twitter.com/tammymumuk/

 

Big thanks to Sarah for guest posting this week. I love the honesty in this post and the moral of the story is clear. We should never judge others. It’s not smart or clever. Everyone has a right to enjoy life how they see fit and shouldn’t come under the scrutiny of others. Sarah – don’t forget to grab your ‘featured on’ badge from the bottom of the page.

 

If you would like to get involved in the Guest Blogger Series, drop me a message by filling in the form on my Contact Me page. I look forward to hearing from you.

 

JakiJellz

 

I regularly link up to these lovely linkys.

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24 Comments

  1. 2nd June 2017 / 6:17 pm

    You definitely shouldn’t feel bad about going on holiday!! In fact I would say go on as many as you can, because once your kids are in school you are so restricted to when you can go and the prices are crazy!

    We love to travel, but having a teen and an almost teen means that we are school holiday only travellers at the moment and we have to look for deals to be able to get on more than one break a year. It’s so frustrating! I think those people who are having a go at you are probably just jealous of your lifestyle hun xx #PoCoLo

    ps Once the little ones get older your holidays will start to feel like they used to!

  2. 3rd June 2017 / 7:44 am

    you are right, it’s not bragging, it’s celebrating our successes. we shouldn’t be made to feel guilty by others who chose to do things differently. We’ve travelled a lot over the years, with and without kids and we want to share our holidays and the highlights, but I’ve often been told I’m just showing off, do you know what? that’s other peoples problems, not mine

  3. 3rd June 2017 / 8:35 am

    Holidays should be taken at every opportunity so go for it. I love getting away whenever I can with my boys, it’s great for them to travel and they really benefit from the change of routine and shift in culture.
    Mainy
    #blogstravaganza

  4. 3rd June 2017 / 12:32 pm

    I’ve always had an issue with how people perceive themselves to be ‘lucky’ for the luxuries they have. Whilst I’m not saying this is always the case, a lot of the time it isn’t luck that takes you to these places. It’s damn hard work that you continue to put in, to give your children experiences in life that they will treasure. You definitely shouldn’t feel bad about it, it’s a fine example to set to your littles! Thanks so much for sharing with #Blogstravaganza xx

    • 10th June 2017 / 6:11 am

      exactly, i hate how people say we’re lucky when it’s sheer hard work and sorting our priorities

  5. 6th June 2017 / 7:07 am

    Thank you so much Jaki For featuring me and thank you everyone for your lovely comments xx

  6. 6th June 2017 / 8:21 am

    Fair play. Do what you can. If life affords you the flexibility to gage holiday then do it. Enjoy yourselves as a family. Once again, fair play

  7. 6th June 2017 / 8:23 am

    It’s definitely hard work holidaying with children, there are some fab moments that make it worth while (just about lol), but being in an unfamiliar environment, trying to keep some level of routine but also enjoying those different experiences on offer on holiday, it’s a really difficult balancing act! #TriumphantTales

  8. 6th June 2017 / 8:33 am

    Definitely don’t feel bad- I wouldn’t apologise for having holidays and definitely good to make the most of it as it’s a bugger once school starts and prices rocket!! #triumphanttales

  9. 6th June 2017 / 8:48 am

    I really need a holiday.

    #triumphanttales

  10. 6th June 2017 / 8:56 am

    I love the honesty of this Sarah. We should never have to apologise or explain ourselves to anyone should we. I totally get everything you have said. My favourite times are the times Chris isn’t working. Life is so much better. Happier. More relaxed. I obviously adore and cherish the times Molly and I spend together each day but our times as a family are just wonderful. Chris has just taken a week off work last week and while we didn’t go away, we made sure we did something every day as a family and it was brilliant. Going on holiday with your children and letting them experience other cultures and ways of life from such a young age is brilliant. You should continue as it will definitely make them more open minded as you say. And, i know they are too young to know about the recent events in Manchester and London but as they get older and have an understanding of world events, if you continue to take them on holiday, you are showing them the importance of living their lives to the fullest and to not let fear get in the way. . And i love reading all about your adventures too! X #TriumphantTales

  11. 6th June 2017 / 9:00 am

    Great post, never feel bad or that you have to explain your life to ANYONE! it is your life and you live it the way You want to. screw everyone else’s opinion, its your memories we are all left with so if you can make 100’s of them from amazing family holidays then do!

    #triumphanttales

  12. 6th June 2017 / 10:44 am

    I would love to be able to jet off at a moments notice but my bank account hasn’t got the funds to let it happen. Live your life the way you want to and don’t feel that you have to answer to anyone! #triumphanttales

  13. 6th June 2017 / 8:20 pm

    No way should you apologise, live your life the way you want to live it and just ignore the negative comments. I am a bit jealous though..what I would do for more than one holiday a year!xx #anythinggoes

  14. 6th June 2017 / 9:51 pm

    I agree, live and let live. Family time is so important. Great holiday snaps! #TriumphantTales

  15. 7th June 2017 / 6:55 pm

    Wow, that’s amazing! We sometimes scrape one holiday a year – and that’s if we’re lucky haha! I’d love to be able to do this with my family – those who try to judge you for it are simply jealous. You raise your family how YOU want to! #triumphanttales Becky x

  16. 7th June 2017 / 8:29 pm

    #triumphanttales what an interesting observation…perhaps others are jealous, or may be they just have their opinion thats are different. i think when we place our posts on social media or release them to the world, i guess we have to be hardened to others opinions that they share – thats what we invite in the comment box, right? Thats freedom of speech…or in this case written word. enjoy making memories – thats all that really matters when it comes to family life x

  17. Mom Of Two Little Girls
    7th June 2017 / 8:38 pm

    Well said lovely! Don’t apologise! Your life is yours to live! I live a ‘privledged’ life according to millions of people too, but I pay for it in a currency they have no concept of, very similar to yours. That is nothing to be ashamed of. Live your life lovely. x
    #triumphanttales

  18. 7th June 2017 / 8:45 pm

    Don’t feel bad about holidays. If that’s how things work for you with hubby’s hours, then so be it. Enjoy it while you can, and sod anyone who moans.
    #TriumphantTales

  19. 8th June 2017 / 6:10 pm

    Gosh you should never have to apologise for having holidays! We manage two a year and I moan about how hard it is with four children, but I also love our holidays too! #triumphanttales

  20. 8th June 2017 / 8:44 pm

    I’m totally with you. Enjoy your family time and never feel bad #AnythingGoes

  21. 8th June 2017 / 9:43 pm

    You should never apologise for what you choose to do with your time as a family, it is nobody’s business. And you are so right to take every opportunity to get away and explore as a family, before you are dictated to by the school holidays when everything is just super expensive. Enjoy every minute, and I know many of those minutes are so tough with two littlies, so close in age. #AnythingGoes

  22. randommusings29
    9th June 2017 / 5:57 pm

    Sounds to me like you’ve encountered some jealous people! Why should you feel bad about having holidays!
    Thanks for linking up to #AnythingGoes 🙂
    Debbie

  23. Morgan Prince
    13th June 2017 / 3:05 pm

    I totally agree Sarah, good for you.
    Thanks for linking to #pocolo

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