Guest Blogger Series: To Baldly Go – As A Parent Of Older Kids

Guest Blogger Series: To Baldly Go – As A Parent Of Older Kids

I am loving hosting this series! It’s going down a storm and so I find myself here again, just two weeks since the last guest blog post. This week I’m handing over the reins to CaptainKirt who is talking to us about life as a parent of older kids. 

Hello, allow me to introduce myself (as they say in the song). I go by the online moniker of CaptainKirt and I am a married father in his mid-forties. I’ve been blogging for 15 years but for quite a lot of that I’ve been coasting with it. Last year I decided to ‘turn it up a notch’ and start with promoting my posts and refreshing the whole thing with some excellent results. I don’t have a particular niche or category, I don’t apologise for this. You can catch my posts including my new webcomic series at www.kirt.me.uk. Anyway, this year I’ve been asked to do a couple of guest blogs, this is my first and it’s a real honour and a pleasure to do.

Guest Blog Series CaptainKirt

I read a lot of blogs and I’ve noticed there are quite a few featuring parents of young children, that’s a brilliant thing. For one it’s a fantastic way of capturing the moments that are so precious. But what happens when those moments are no more? What about when the kids are all grown up?

Parentingwise I’ve pretty much earned the t-shirt. Most parents will get through without any major issues but we had some massive problems along the way which changed so much about our lives. Hopefully the bad stuff is behind us, anyway this post isn’t about that particular journey.

I first became a parent when I was 25 and it’s safe to say it changed my life overnight. The weight of responsibility was enormous, the planning and putting another person first with everything you do was unexpected. Of course the joys always outweigh the changes but it was overwhelming at the time.

Fast forward 20 years and where do we find ourselves? The kids are pretty much grown, they are independent and only want money and lifts, well that’s not entirely true but so much of the day to day stuff has gone. The youngest takes herself to school and back and when at home she spends most of her time in her room. The eldest is 20 and has just moved back home (which proves that you pretty much always need your parents). So what happens to the parents when the kids aren’t needing them so much? Well we never had much support from our respective families in regard of childcare so the biggest thing is the rediscovery of ourselves as a couple. Over the last year or so we started ‘dating’ again. Nothing flash or fancy, the odd trip to the local pub or a bite to eat somewhere. The point is we started to rediscover the people we used to be to some degree and we also discovered that we loved it, this new but not new aspect in our life is welcome. It’s a good thing that we reached this stage in our lives and discovered we still like each other, I’ve seen relationships end after the kids grow up because that’s all they had. We have always allowed each other to pursue our own hobbies and interests, this has always given us the ‘something’ so when we come together we have things to talk about.

What I think I’m trying to say is that life doesn’t end when the kids aren’t as dependent as they once were. I look forward to watching them in their own lives and to my life changing and developing. You never stop being a parent, even when the children are grown, they always need you.

And grandchildren? No, I’m not ready for that just yet.

 

CaptainKirt blogs at To Baldly Go and is on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram

 

Big thanks CaptainKirt for giving us hope – that we will have a life after this rollercoaster called parenting! Don’t forget to grab your featured badge from the bottom of the page.

If you would like to get involved in the Guest Blogger Series, drop me a message by filling in the form on my Contact Me page. I look forward to hearing from you.

JakiJellz

Follow:

18 Comments

  1. 24th February 2017 / 4:24 pm

    So true, we get wrapped up in the little things and can’t wait for the next stage, but one day the next stage will be “Go away dad, leave me alone!”

    Great post! #thatfridaylinky

    • 24th February 2017 / 7:43 pm

      It seeks up on you and before you know it you have free time and no longer need to arrange childcare. Just make sure you have something to fill that time with. Thanks for reading. 🙂

  2. Nige
    25th February 2017 / 10:23 pm

    Great post and I couldn’t agree more be careful you sideline the milestones too quickly fab interview Thanks for linking to the #THAT FRIDAY LINKY come back next week please

    • Jaki
      26th February 2017 / 8:14 am

      Thanks Nigel.

  3. 26th February 2017 / 11:17 am

    Thinking about grandkids?! eek! #blogstravaganza

  4. 26th February 2017 / 12:44 pm

    Oh loved reading this – I’m a parent of teens so could really relate to this post. Love the part where you say you and your wife still quite like each other – the ‘dates’ my husband and I have I’m loving again – our three are getting worried for all the plans we are making that don’t involve them! It’s great too to be watching the children become who they are going to be – one of my total favourite parts of having teens – which is great because there is plenty of not quite so rosy times!! #fortheloveofBLOG

  5. 26th February 2017 / 5:31 pm

    I love finding new blogs, great interview. Thanks for linking up to #ThatFridayLinky

    • Jaki
      26th February 2017 / 11:06 pm

      That’s my aim with this series! Glad you’re enjoying it 🙂

  6. 27th February 2017 / 3:43 pm

    Time certainly flies by. And it doesn’t slow down in later years. Wonderful post!

  7. 27th February 2017 / 5:32 pm

    I love that you are dating again and finding yourselves after having children! I take my hat of to you for reaching the other side, here’s to a well deserved rest after all the hard work you’ve put in for years! Thanks so much fo sharing with #Blogstravaganza xx

  8. 1st March 2017 / 4:44 pm

    Love this post! I’ll be checking out the series. #DreamTeam

    • Jaki
      2nd March 2017 / 9:57 pm

      Thank you. Please do and if you ever want to get involved, let me know.

  9. 2nd March 2017 / 10:43 pm

    Good to find another new blog to read via this series – thanks for sharing with #PoCoLo

    • Jaki
      3rd March 2017 / 8:41 pm

      Thanks Steph. Glad you enjoyed it 🙂

  10. 3rd March 2017 / 12:00 am

    A I love this. Having older kids terrifies me, I love the little cuddles and the fact they really need me now! Literally terrifies me how quick hey are growing, wagghh! Lovely post xx

    #FriYAYLinky

  11. 3rd March 2017 / 2:38 pm

    I often think about this and wonder what will happen when our children are older. It’s a long way off but it will happen. Thanks for linking up at #fortheloveofBLOG. Claire x

  12. 6th March 2017 / 11:01 am

    Great guest post and love Kirt’s doodle. It’s interesting to read about what life is like with older children. We have a way to go still, but I woul dlike to think that we would do the whole dating thing again for fun. Great to meet you Kirt!

    Thank you for linking up to the #dreamteam

  13. 24th March 2017 / 1:38 pm

    Great! I love that you’re saying what I already thought was true, as long as you allow each other to be yourselves then you can still be happy after the children have grown. That’s how the Hubby and I are and while my youngest is only 7 (almost 8) I’m confident we’ll be fine when he’s older. 🙂
    Thanks for linking to #pocolo
    (sorry for the epically late comment!)

Leave a Reply