Our Children And Their Emotions

Our Children And Their Emotions

It’s just occurred to me how fragile and emotional our children can be.

In the past I’ve discussed the issues I’ve had in the past when it comes to dropping the Little Man off at nursery, and while we still have the odd day where there are tears, they are not tears to be concerned about. I know this because seconds after I have left he is absolutely fine, playing with his friends without a care in the world.

What’s spurred me to write this post is something I wasn’t expecting. Something I wasn’t really prepared for.

Little Man has clearly reached the age where he understands things so much more. Stories in books and on the television. He has begun to feel the emotions from particular storylines. Happy stories are great, obviously. He laughs and giggles along to the funny sights he sees. But just now when watching ‘We’re Going On A Bear Hunt’ I realised that my little boy isn’t so little anymore. He’s a real human being with feelings. He’s a sensitive sole. This much is now clear.

At the end of ‘We’re Going On A Bear Hunt’ the bear goes back to his cave, on his own, looking all sad. And it finished, I looked across at my Little Man and he had a quivery bottom lip and tears welling in his eyes. Of course I pulled him close and asked him what was wrong and he simply replied. “The bear Mummy. He’s all on his own and that makes me sad”. He burst into tears.

Woah. I wasn’t prepared for such a real life outpouring of emotions. We’ve seen the tears from silly tantrums and the usual toddler/small child crying fits. But this was different. This was raw. These were tears because he genuinely felt really sad in his heart for what he had witnessed. For what he had watched and what he understood of it. Bless his heart.

So as I said. It seems I have a sensitive soul on my hands and this isn’t a bad thing. It’s made me really realise that as he’s growing up, just how much more aware he is of things. What he sees going on around him. How much he is understanding the world he is in. And I need to factor that in to his upbringing. He’s not just a little baby or toddler anymore. He’s a real person. A real little boy who will grow into a real man and it’s us as his parents that need to help mould him into who he will become. It’s us a parents that need to help him deal with the emotions he feels, so that he knows how to handle them when he’s older.

Our Children And Their Emotions

No pressure then.

I think it’s safe to say we won’t be watching that particular tv programme anytime soon. But having said that, he’s been particularly cuddly ever since, and I won’t complain about that. He won’t do that forever.

Have you experienced this yet with your children? How do you handle it? I’d love to hear your thoughts.

 

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51 Comments

  1. 13th March 2017 / 1:49 pm

    My son had a similar reaction to the bear at the end of ‘We’re going on a bear hunt’. You just want to wrap them up and protect them from everything xx #MarvMondays

  2. Nige
    14th March 2017 / 8:11 am

    Fab post and read. It never ceases to amazes me what my 5 year old twins get emotional about.silver lining you get lots of cuddles as you said thanks for hosting #triumphanttales

  3. 14th March 2017 / 9:19 am

    My eldest is very sensitive and hates any programme where people get cross (the Fat Controller when Thomas behaves like an idiot yet again, for example)

  4. 14th March 2017 / 9:23 am

    That is so sweet! My Doll isn’t old enough yet for those kinds of emotions (empathy, sympathy) but it hadn’t even occurred to me that it would happen some day! What a responsibility! I hope when Doll gets there it results in more cuddles, too 🙂
    #TriumphantTales
    Jaclyn Bree recently posted…Packing a (Second) Hospital BagMy Profile

  5. 14th March 2017 / 12:02 pm

    Oh what a sweet little boy! Alfie hasn’t really started exploring his emotions just yet, but I’m not sure how I would really deal with it. Thanks for hosting #TriumphantTales

  6. 14th March 2017 / 12:25 pm

    Even though it’s natural and normal for our children to feel emotion, that doesn’t make it easy for us to see! I love to hear mine laugh and giggle, but my eldest has started having nigh terrors and I can’t stand how frightened she gets and how sad they make her feel. #TriumphantTales
    The Tale of Mummyhood recently posted…Spring Garden InspirationMy Profile

  7. 14th March 2017 / 1:21 pm

    This is such a sweet post. Bless your little guy. My little man is the same, he’s very sensitive & sweet, and there’s nothing wrong with that. Also, I used to feel the same about that book. I haven’t read it to my little ones!

  8. 14th March 2017 / 2:47 pm

    My son used to be just like this. I think they hit an age where they completely follow the story of something and are invested emotionally in it. We went through a big spell of time where we literally couldn’t get to the end of any film because we couldn’t get past the sad bit or the scary bit (and I’m talking childrens films here) – he’s mostly grown out of it now at 7 but is still a sensitive soul x

  9. 14th March 2017 / 3:01 pm

    This was such a smart post. I feel like too often I find that parents put their children’s emotions on the back burner. I am hyper aware of my 9 year olds mental health because I suffer myself and I am sure she will inherit my issues. But every parent should be watching their children’s emotions carefully. #TriumphantTales

    • Jaki
      14th March 2017 / 9:40 pm

      I completely agree with you. Small things can have such a huge impact on them. I am so very careful about what I say, how I react. They are so influential at this age. And his ears?! He’ll hear anything when he wants to! 🙂

  10. 14th March 2017 / 7:57 pm

    Oh wow, I hadn’t even thought about this! I’m emotional enough myself, I don’t think I can handle Jacob being upset about real things! It must be really hard to see, although it does mean you’ve raised a lovely, compassionate little boy. So well done! #TriumphantTales
    Kelly | and Jacob makes three recently posted…Sleep training—my top tipsMy Profile

    • Jaki
      14th March 2017 / 9:38 pm

      Ah thank you. That’s a lovely thing to say. I too am emotional so it was a bit of a shock. At least now I am prepared for next time! 🙂

  11. 14th March 2017 / 8:22 pm

    Ah what a lovely little boy. I think you can help children butletting them explore and understand their own emotions is part of growing up. Willow isn’t at an age to understand emotions just yet – all she knows is feeling hungry and sleepy and yells at me for both! #TriumphantTales
    Kat recently posted…Sure Start rocks! My Profile

    • Jaki
      14th March 2017 / 9:37 pm

      Oh I get that too!! 🙂 But yes you are right. Growing up is amazing when you think about it. They have so much going on in their little heads, it’s ever likely they will have a little tantrum now and then. Or all the time…..! 🙂 Thanks for linking up to #TriumphantTales

  12. 14th March 2017 / 8:33 pm

    What a darling boy ❤ My Biggest is also a very sensitive girl, wise beyond her years. Being sensitive myself it’s hard to watch, but something which gives me comfort is remembering that my job is not to take her sad feelings away but always be there for her to help her understand and come to terms with them. #TriumphantTales See you next week x
    Carly recently posted…To Cook in Peace: #TuesdayHaikuMy Profile

    • Jaki
      14th March 2017 / 9:35 pm

      That’s a brilliant way of looking at it. I too am sensitive and rather emotional so I know what you mean. Thanks for coming back this week. Great to have you 🙂 #TriumphantTales x

  13. 14th March 2017 / 8:37 pm

    It doesn’t get any easier! My five year old was home sick today so we watched the movie version of Cinderella. I could see the cogs turning and all afternoon we had question about Mummies and Daddies going to heaven, getting sick and death in general… She’s a deep soul that one!
    Thanks for hosting #TriumphantTales – good luck with the new linky!
    MMT recently posted…Birth storiesMy Profile

    • Jaki
      14th March 2017 / 9:34 pm

      Oh my. It is things like that that will be hard. I did have to try and explain death around 18 months ago but he was nowhere near understanding. Nothing prepares you for those kind of situations does it? Thanks so much for joining us this week. #TriumphantTales

  14. 14th March 2017 / 9:06 pm

    Aw this made me feel sad. Bless him. My girlie hasn’t got that far yet with the empathy side of things but I guess it’s to come. I will just let her cry and talk about it with her. It’s a good thing I’m sure…just a bit sad to see! Thanks for hosting x

    • Jaki
      14th March 2017 / 9:32 pm

      It was so sad to witness him being so upset. But nothing a good Mumma cuddle couldn’t sort out. Thanks for linking up to #TriumphantTales. Good to have you join us 🙂 x

  15. 14th March 2017 / 9:12 pm

    What s lovely post about how we develop and learn our emotions growing up. Do heart felt about the bear being alone in the cave #dreamteam

    • Jaki
      14th March 2017 / 9:26 pm

      Melts your heart doesn’t it?!

  16. 14th March 2017 / 10:33 pm

    Awww this made me feel quite emotional, he is so sweet!! Megan is the most emotional of my children, she cries at tv shows, films, other children crying!! I think it’s so interesting to see our childrens emotions develop and also how they differ! #triumphanttales
    five little doves recently posted…Johnson’s Bedtime Baby Sleep AppMy Profile

  17. 14th March 2017 / 11:23 pm

    Awwwww bless him. Molly’s a bit young to really feel emotion yet but she did once hand me her blankies when I was upset about something . Her not having or giving away her blankies is huge for Molly so I was very impressed lol. ☺ #TriumphantTales
    Sam – StressyMama recently posted…Party Time!My Profile

  18. 15th March 2017 / 1:48 pm

    Our little man is exactly the same with a bear hunt! He is also sad that the childrens mum and daddy arent there! Im glad hes such an emotional soul but it is tough to see him go throught all these feelings. #TriumphantTales
    pam lorimer recently posted…Food for thought..the feeding journey continuesMy Profile

  19. 15th March 2017 / 6:48 pm

    Bless him! It’s so true they do get to that age when they understand a lot more what is going on around them. #TriumphantTales

  20. 15th March 2017 / 8:50 pm

    Beautiful post. My little one’s not quite there yet, laughs if I or someone on CBeebies hurts themselves!

  21. 16th March 2017 / 4:51 am

    the one that has stayed with me was 7 years ago, when child 4 of 5 was 15 and he had his first heartbreak, I just couldn’t say or do anything to help him, it broke my heart seeing him so sad. I’ve asked him since if there was anything I could’ve said or done differently and he said ‘just letting him be heartbroken was more than enough’ it was something he had to go through and he says if anyone had told him to man up or get over he’s have probably punched them #TriumphantTales

  22. 16th March 2017 / 12:02 pm

    Awww bless him. There is something so pure about a child showing their emotions. So unfiltered and fragile. My daughter is very sensitive and can get very emotional at certain storylines (Watching peter rabbit yesterday he was captured – she was beside herself with worry and calling for me to help him!). Its great you are aware and giving him lots of comfort , I wrote a post on difficult emotions http://caringinthechaos.co.uk/5-tips-to-help-your-child-with-difficult-emotions/ as my daughter has special needs so it is sometimes extra hard to explain these things to her. Lovely post x

  23. 16th March 2017 / 6:35 pm

    oh how adorable is he????? i actually pouted reading this from the cuteness! They do say boys are more emotional than girls and I for one have no problems with my little mummy’s boy =] #familyfun

  24. 16th March 2017 / 7:59 pm

    What a beautiful little soul and how amazing that he is already showing such empathy! My youngest is also very sensitive and extremely caring and I love him to bits for it but I do worry that he will be taken for granted by some. Thank you for linking up to #ablogginggoodtime 🎉
    Catie: An Imperfect Mum recently posted…#ablogginggoodtime #40My Profile

  25. 16th March 2017 / 10:41 pm

    I’ve not experienced this yet but it’s only a matter of time! Thanks for the warning xx

    #sharingthebloglove

  26. 17th March 2017 / 7:36 pm

    Not quite old enough yet here we are still going through the toddler tear stage!! That is really cute though and what a realisation to overcome! ‪Thank you for linking up to the #familyfunlinky‬
    Karen TwoTinyHands recently posted…Back On The Bike #FamilyFunLinkyMy Profile

  27. 17th March 2017 / 8:17 pm

    Oh gosh, we had exactly the same response recently at the end of the Bear Hunt book! Now every time we get to the end we have to say “bye bye bear” all cheery! I know his nursery love to talk about emotions, so I think his focus on ‘sad’ has come from there – but he definitely understands it and can always tell me when he’s sad. I think it’s great to have a good sense of empathy early on – I was really impressed when his cousin left his comforter at my parents and Max said ‘he’ll be sad’ and wanted to take it round to him. Thanks for joining us at #SharingtheBlogLove
    Katy – Hot Pink Wellingtons recently posted…The Pregnancy Diaries: Week 27My Profile

  28. 17th March 2017 / 10:37 pm

    What a lovely little boy you are raising. We had a similar thing when the Twins were little but last year, with Sports Relief we watched one of the films of 3 young boys in Africa who had lost their parents and who had to live on the streets. Not long after that the boys went to bed and as I was tucking them in Twin 1 had a little sniff and a sob. He was so upset by the film (it had been on early in the programme, it wasn’t like I had let him stay up really late and witness one of the more harrowing tales) and when I asked him what had upset him he replied the he “just wanted them all to be happy, like we are,” and “why do sad things happen to children”. It completely made me cry too and we had a good honest chat with everything he needed to know at that time. When I went back downstairs much later a follow up film to the earlier one was on, showing exactly how the money raised could help these children. It turns out that the film of them as children was from a few years ago and now Sport Relief had returned to show the difference they make. These three boys had now grown into young men and they all had their own successful small businesses and above all were safe and happy. I had to record it to show Twin 1. He was glad I did and has cemented in his belief that all his fundraising is worthwhile.
    I think raising boys is wonderful and allowing them to engage with their emotions and show their empathy and kindness for others will only stand them in good stead for the futures. Well rounded, respectful, kind men.
    #ablogginggoodtime

    (just seen how long my comment was! Hope I didn’t send you to sleep!)
    the aloha mummy recently posted…When you worry for a Rock Star!My Profile

  29. 18th March 2017 / 2:37 pm

    I’ve noticed my daughter understanding emotions more now too, like sad and scared. If I cry she says “mummy, sad” and looks worried. I guess at some point they learn and we have to help them understand it all. xx #TwinklyTuesday
    Susie at This Is Me Now recently posted…What I’ve learned this week #20My Profile

  30. 18th March 2017 / 5:45 pm

    Oh, we have quite the sensitive one in our Big. She is a little version of my Mrs. She needs some thicker skin and worries, and has just about the biggest heart on the planet. My Little, she is made of tougher stuff and it’s just amazing how they do that! Act so differently with all the same components entering the equation. Bravo for you to notice so early on what an authentic and genuine little soul you have! Way to go mama! #dreamteam

  31. 19th March 2017 / 11:22 am

    Awww this is so lovely! Your boy is obviously really thoughtful and that’s amazing. We need more of him in the world!

    I do remember my children getting to the point when they thought outside the box a little more and it’s a good thing as it’s a more complex way of thinking. All you can do is support his way of thinking and talk to him about it!

    I think that this is all down to growing up and a way of recognising what is right and wrong in the world. Sounds like you are raising a kind, intelligent, and thoughtful boy – go you! 🙂

    Thanks for linking up to #AnythingGoes

  32. 19th March 2017 / 5:02 pm

    Aww what a little sweetie! I’ve noticed how much more aware Zach is now of storyline and he’s always needing explanations. You are right about factoring this into his upbringing. Thanks for linking up with #TwinklyTuesday
    Lisa (mummascribbles) recently posted…Taking a full year of maternity leaveMy Profile

  33. 19th March 2017 / 8:57 pm

    Aww we have had this too from about 2ish or so. Then it leads on to the but why’s… and so on. It’s lovely that your little one is so sensitive and thoughtful, it means he cares and that is so important. Thanks for sharing with the #DreamTeam xx
    Annette, 3 Little Buttons recently posted…#DreamTeam Linky 46My Profile

  34. 21st March 2017 / 12:58 pm

    Ah that is so sweet. Alice is the sensitive one out of my two. She gets upset easily and I have to be more mindful what she watches and reads. It plays on her mind too and she is an overthinker too. Thank you for joining us at #SharingtheBlogLove
    Laura – dear bear and beany recently posted…Review: Peter Rabbit Race and Chase Games…My Profile

  35. 21st March 2017 / 6:38 pm

    Very true, and poor bear! I always feel sorry for the bear too #ablogginggoodtime

  36. 22nd March 2017 / 7:44 pm

    I don’t think mine have been affected by TV programmes in this way yet…it shows yours thinks of others! #familyfunlinky
    Crummy Mummy recently posted…Why I’ve written off my 30sMy Profile

  37. 23rd March 2017 / 7:23 pm

    Aww bless his heart, we haven’t seen that yet, but now I’m not so sure I want to risk it haha. xx #sharingthebloglove

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